Anxiety and worry have a direct link with your mental health. And, whatever affects your mind has the capacity to alter the course of your life.
Let me ask you….
Are you feeling worried or anxious about things in your life?
Do you have a feeling of excessive fear or worry?
Do you have a feeling of inner restlessness?
Do you feel continual nervousness or extreme stress?
Let me tell you, you are not alone!
According to the National Comorbidity Study Replication (NCS-R), there are approximately 102 million adults in the United States who will have struggled with an anxiety disorder at some point in their lifetime. Among that total, women are far more likely to experience anxiety disorder than men. Harvard Medical School, 2007. National Comorbidity Survey (NCS). (2017, August 21). Retrieved from https://www.hcp.med.harvard.edu/ncs/index.php. Data Table 2: 12-month prevalence DSM-IV/WMH-CIDI disorders by sex and cohort.
In fact, I’ve experienced my share of anxiety and was even diagnosed with more than one anxiety disorder in the past. So, you are reading a book written by someone who has been exactly where you are right now.
I had anxiety so bad at one point, in my early teens, that I couldn’t even attend youth group or Sunday school. I used to hide in the bathroom with my Bible and pray nobody would find me. Right after I graduated from high school, literally the same year, 9/11 happened. Even though I wasn’t close to it personally, I developed a feeling of insecurity that I had never felt before in my entire life. It really shook the comfort I had previously had about our leader’s abilities to protect us. I no longer trusted that I was safe when I realized the bubble I was in was really just an illusion. As an adult, I ran from public speaking, avoided phone calls with strangers, struggled to keep a job if it involved talking to anyone, wondered if every datable man I met secretly thought I was weird or just not pretty enough, and had a general sense that something bad was going to happen at any given moment. I was a wreck!
I dealt with social anxiety, obsessive-compulsive disorder (which is simply a way I dealt with my anxiety to try to control things), and panic attacks. I was massively shy, afraid to speak up in a crowd, fearful of the future, terrified I’d be laughed at or made fun of at every second, worried about what people thought of me, afraid I wasn’t thin enough or pretty enough, and just constantly concerned with what people thought of me. These fears followed me well into my 20s and 30s, which is why I wanted to write this book, so that you can’t put a stop to the fear and not have to take it with you into the rest of your life.
Oh my…do I know what it’s like! That burning in my stomach. That fear that creeps up that leaves every muscle in my body paralyzed. That lightheadedness when I think about things that worry me.
Sister, you are not alone! Even Christian girls and women deal with anxiety and fear.
Thinking that we are alone and the only one who feels these things, is one of the lies of Satan that makes us think there is something wrong with us. That it’s just us and that we are just weird, a “problem,” or that we are the only one dealing with this challenge. This lie keeps us from reaching out for help and keeps us in the same pattern of fear with no way out.
So, know that it’s not just you. You aren’t weird. It is NOT just you. And, know that there is hope that you can beat your anxiety – God’s way!
God Cares About Our Mental Health (and so should we!)
It’s quite easy for us to focus on our physical health, but we frequently make the mistake of overlooking our mental health. However, everything in our lives indicates how carelessly we approach mental health.
Do you mind if I startle you? The truth is that your mental health is as vital as, if not more important than, your physical health. For one, your mental health is inextricably linked to your MIND, and the mind is the “Central Processing Unit” of every human’s conceptions, as well as the “Foundation” of every processed and implemented thought.
Do you recognize the significance of your own mental health? Do you ever wonder why the Bible rightly advised us in Proverbs 4:23 NIV: “Above all else, guard your heart, for everything you do flows from it”?
You see, every problem, case, concept, and innovation begins in the mind, which means that everyone is a product of his or her own thoughts. “For as he thinks in his heart, so is he” (Proverbs 23:7a NKJV). This means that what you think about in your mind/heart is what you will ultimately become, what will ultimately manifest into your life because your thoughts directly affect your actions that you take. No person grows better than his or her thoughts. You will grow no more happy or sad than the ideas and thoughts that you have in your mind.
God cares about our thoughts and tells us to guard our heart, knowing that what we think about will become a big part of our lives in the physical world. If God cares about our minds and hearts so much to warn us about these things, we also should care about these things.
Think About What You’re Thinking About
Have you ever stopped to think about what it is you’re thinking about? Many of us go through life just letting our thoughts run wild. We never stop to ask ourselves what we are really thinking about and how it might be affecting us.
I have a quick, little assignment for you….
Part I
Pause for a minute from reading this book and ask yourself what you have been thinking about over the last 20 minutes before picking up this book. Over the last hour. Over the last 24 hours. Over the last week. Go ahead. Think about it.
Now, take a piece of paper or grab your ipad, computer, or phone and write a list of all the things you’ve been thinking about recently. Do you notice any themes? Any common elements to what you’ve been focused on? Are they positive things you’ve been thinking about? Negative? Sinful? Hopeful?
Have you ever stopped to think about what it is you’re thinking about? For many of you, this might be a new thing, to evaluate what you have been thinking about, but it is something that we need to make a habit of. We need to think about what we are thinking about.
We can’t stop anxiety-producing thoughts unless we can pause and ask ourselves what we are thinking about.
Part II
Now that you have your list of thoughts that have been going through your mind and you’ve also evaluated these thoughts to see if they have any common themes, if they are negative or positive, etc., I’d like for you to ask yourself how helpful each of these thoughts are and ask yourself whether each of these thoughts makes you feel anything specific (what emotions you feel while thinking them).
For example, if you keep having a constant thought you play over and over in your head that says you’re fat, ugly, or unloved….how does this thought make you feel? Is it making you feel anxious? Sad? Depressed? Is this thought helpful to you in your life? Is this thought making your life better or worse by thinking about it?
Go ahead and do this with all of the thoughts you’ve written down.
Getting Control Over Our Wild Thoughts
From time to time, we all have unpleasant thoughts and ideas. However, if these thoughts constantly overpower you, you should carefully examine what you’re thinking and how your thoughts affect your mental health.
This internal monologue is an unavoidable aspect of your mental environment. We all “talk to ourselves” inside of our minds. It’s normal. Most of us have even unexpected or intrusive thoughts as well…thoughts that pop in and out of our thoughts that we weren’t consciously trying to bring to mind. It’s there 24 hours a day, 7 days a week.
These thoughts are the continual background noise in your life, even if you aren’t constantly conscious of it. Now is a good time to pay attention to your thoughts.
Even though it may not seem like it, we have the ability to grab ahold of our thoughts and take charge of them, change them into whatever we want, and even stop them in their tracks!
The bible says that we are capable of controlling our thoughts, even those intrusive ones that like to show up. In 2 Corinthians 10:5, it is clear that we can and must “take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ.” If we weren’t capable of taking our thoughts captive and controlling them, we wouldn’t have been told we can do so in Scripture. God would never ask us to do anything that we are not capable of doing.
Taking Every Thought Captive to the Obedience of Christ
Isn’t that difficult though? Taking every thought captive and making it obedient to Christ…that sounds so hard!
The good news is that God never asked us to do things on our own. We have access to something the world doesn’t have! As a child of God, you have access to God’s power in your life.
How?
I love scripture! God gave us a guidebook and gave us everything we need to know for life, including how to access His power when we feel anxious. “His divine power has granted to us all things that pertain to life and godliness, through the knowledge of him who called us to his own glory and excellence…” (2 Peter 1:3, ESV).
First of all, the moment that you repented and believed on the the Lord Jesus Christ, you received the gift of the Holy Spirit (Act 2:38 KJV)! And the Holy Spirit is our “Helper,” “Comforter,” and “Counselor.” When He dwells in us, we receive His power over fear (2 Timothy 1:6-7)!
You want God’s secret to overcoming anxiety? Well, it’s not so much of a secret; it’s right in God’s Word. If you don’t read any more of this book (but, I hope you do!), I pray you take this one thing with you. So pay attention to this right here 🙂 God gave us a simple formula on how to beat anxiety! Are you ready?
“…do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus” (Philippians 4:6-7, ESV).
Ok, let’s break it down into some simple steps!
Step #1: Make a choice that you’re not going to be anxious – “do not be anxious about anything”
Step #2: Take your worries to God in prayer – “but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God”
Step #3: Bring your prayers to Him with thanksgiving (this means with the expectation that He has already answered your prayers; thanking Him in advance for what you expect Him to do in your life) – “with thanksgiving”
Step #4: Accept and wait for His peace – “And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.”
You can try in your own will to try to stop your reckless thoughts, but without God’s help, it can be challenging. However, with His help, we know that we have access to His power and it is not just our own willpower trying to make the change.
You May Have Tried Before and Failed
Our thoughts sometimes seem to come out of nowhere, often unwittingly and uninvited.
Some of your ideas are illogical and useless. Some are positive and inspiring. Some are vile, negative, and harmful.
Whether negative, neutral, or positive, these thoughts rule our minds just as your home can become overwhelmed when you have too many things.
Unfortunately, cleaning up your mental clutter isn’t as easy as cleaning up the house. You can’t “throw away” thoughts and expect them to go away. Just like an endless game of whack-a-mole, your negative thoughts have a chance to resurface once you hit them.
And, we often like to blame others or our circumstance for why our thoughts are the way they are. It’s sometimes easier to point the finger than to take responsibility for our own sloppy minds. “It’s my husband”, “She is just always so rude to me”, ” He’s the one who made me feel this way,” “My job does not satisfy me”, “My friends are disappointing, ” or “My children are disappointing.” Some people blame their church for their problems. They find fault with their pastors, complaining that people are not good enough or that everyone in the world is a hypocrite. There is something in our life that we want to change (Circumstances in life).
Instead of blaming people around us or the circumstances of life that surrounds us with, why not deal with the lies of the devil that comes through in our thoughts. We should always say positive things amidst the circumstances. And, WE CAN shift to positive thoughts, if we simply decide that we are going to seek the help that is so freely offered to us.
Our Words and Thoughts Have Power
If you want to get rid of your anxiety and fear, and indeed live a happy and prosperous life, you MUST shift your words and thoughts.
We simply cannot change anything in our lives without starting with the thoughts in our hearts and the words that come out of our mouths. The Bible tells us to focus our minds on things that are “true, whatever is honorable, whatever is just, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is commendable, if there is any excellence, if there is anything worthy of praise, think about these things” (Philippians 4:8 ESV).
It is by shifting our thoughts and minds to these things that are positive that we can shut the door against the devil’s lies and we will begin to experience happiness.
What Does It Mean to be Happy?
We can define it as a continuing sense of well-being, a state of well-being in relation to life, others, and oneself. We can also define happiness as the absence of mental and emotional discomfort and pain.
The Bible calls the happy “blessed”. In the teaching on the Mount, Jesus refers to those who are happy as blessed or fortunate. They are people who are “spiritually prosperous (that is, with a zest for life and contentment in God’s favor and salvation, regardless of their external conditions)”.
What Is Your Definition of Happy?
Once you have answered this question, I want you to know that it is possible to be happy and free from anxiety and worry, to be truly happy in the deepest recesses of your being, and to remain happy. You must not be a victim of circumstances, occurrences, and relationships. You don’t have to get caught up in persistent painful emotions.
This book was written to help you find the happiness you want and become the person you want to be. You can live happily ever after with who you are and thus have a profound positive effect on those around you.
The three steps to being a happy person you need are:
1. Find your false beliefs.
2. Delete them.
3. Replace and reframe false beliefs with truths. (“It would be stupid to say that I am not loved and worthless. You should rather say, I am loved by the God of the universe with an everlasting love. I have innumerable talents and gifts that are useful for God and people around me and I am of great value to God).
Dr. Amanda Smith 